Will There Be Free Appetizers?

Musings Of A Brilliant Idiot

Non-Fiction - Humor/Comedy
202 Pages
Reviewed on 05/16/2018
Buy on Amazon

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    Book Review

Reviewed by Jack Magnus for Readers' Favorite

In Will There Be Free Appetizers? by Don Ake, the author describes himself as a trucking industry expert, but he’s more popularly known for his humorous blog posts, which quite often concern his love of most things gustatory. This is his second humor/comedy book, and it begins, most appropriately, with a discourse on the etiquette of free appetizers. He also discusses the beach and his ambivalence towards those sandy shores, and that momentous occasion when Don bought his iPhone, the iPhone 6, and the marvels of that high-tech device. Don also relates that horrible moment which comes to all men and women when the first correspondence arrives from the AARP and the special joys that come with being offered the senior citizen prune special.

I have a somewhat limited sense of humor, and I’m always kind of curious to see if a comedy/humor writer can actually get me to crack a smile and maybe even draw a guffaw or three. It’s not an easy accomplishment. I was thus agreeably surprised to discover somewhat of a kindred spirit in Don Ake’s Will There Be Free Appetizers? His outrage over the lack of free appetizers at a business meeting resonated quite deeply, and his despair at a Florida vacation spent watching the rain thunder down in a cramped motel room for days on end will most likely strike answering chords in just about any reader. My own rainy vacation involved a tent filled with damp clothes and gear, and the awfulness of a hike that ended up being a walk through four-foot-deep flooded marshland.

Ake’s genius for mutating lyrics to fit his humorous needs is also put to hilarious use in this collection, and his prose lauding his iPhone was brilliance itself. Add to that the image of a middle-aged man being gleefully pelted with courtesy peanuts by three gorgeous flight attendants while his wife sits there and scowls, and you have the recipe for a collection of humorous essays that passed even my rather stringent tests for humor. Don Ake takes his penchant for humor to absurd lengths, and that’s a very good thing indeed. Will There Be Free Appetizers? is highly recommended.

Stephen Fisher

Will There Be Free Appetizers? Musings Of A Brilliant Idiot by Don Ake is an account of his thoughts, anecdotes, and misadventures while in search of networking meetings to indulge in his favorite pastime of eating a variety of free appetizers. Knowing that he is overweight, he begins with those yucky, Styrofoam tasting things that most of us refer to as rice cakes. Our hero then describes what it is like when he shows up for a meeting and there are no appetizers anywhere in sight. Especially when the agenda clearly stated that there would be free appetizers served... The story takes a turn when he describes going on vacation to the beautiful Sun coast of the Tampa Bay area, during Tropical Storm Colin, following up with Bikini Madness, the beaches of Sarasota, and Treasure Island ( his favorite and mine too). No argument there since I grew up in nearby Seminole. Then there is his hilarious poem "Why I Wear Speedos to the Beach."

Mr. Ake does an outstanding job of describing the appetizers, and lack thereof, and his introduction to delectable scones. He jokes about his misadventures involving the phone app on his iPhone 6, "Pokémon Go," and its bawdy counterpart, "Sammichmon Go." A game where he has to gather ingredients, and then is directed to an establishment to have his sammich made. The laugh out loud results of acquiring more Sammichmon points could only be compared to his love for the Chicago Cubs after defeating his Cleveland Indians in the world series. All in all, Will There Be Free Appetizers? is a fun read with a lot of funny situations by a humble, but brilliant blogger/ author named Don Ake. Well done!

Rosie Malezer

Will There Be Free Appetizers? is Don Ake’s second book which combines his love of blogging and food with a healthy dose of laughter. It deals with the world’s many culinary obsessions and the effects different foods have on our waistlines as, more and more, people tend to put their growling stomachs ahead of their own manners. The unhealthy dieting cycle which follows is disastrous, with most foods resembling Styrofoam or cardboard (both in texture and taste) in order to get us back into shape. The utter blandness of these dietary foods forces those fasting to eventually binge on the foods they crave and a vicious cycle goes round and round. No matter what the occasion – whether you are throwing a party, having a meeting or any type of gathering - just make sure that you offer free food in order to avoid angry attendees.

After reading Don Ake’s first book titled Just Make Me A Sammich, I simply could not wait to get my hands on the sequel. As silly as it sounds, just reading the list of contents at the beginning of Don’s new book had my cheeks soaked with tears from laughter. The humor is blunt but the honesty in the words is ever so real and refreshing. But just like the tantalizing foods discussed in the book, the way in which Will There Be Free Appetizers? is written continues to keep me coming back for more. After reading about the various situations which use food as a human lure, accompanied by the sometimes unfortunate results when said food is not provided as promised, I am reminded of the only reason I smile when I walk in the door at the local vet’s office... free chocolate. No animal is neglected in my country simply because of unlimited chocolate and coffee on arrival; meanwhile my pet is in a cage, casting vicious looks at me with every salivating bite. I wholeheartedly enjoyed every laugh while reading Will There Be Free Appetizers? and very much look forward to Don Ake’s next book of amusement and intrigue. I recommend Will There Be Free Appetizers? to all who love their delicious and savory snacks served up with a healthy dose of laughter.